We all have a level of selfishness, there is no denying that; but its the heart that matters, if you want to serve God with all of your heat, and still fail, does that mean you are disobeying Him. We all struggle with one thing or another, for some of us it is stepping out and telling others about Christ and what He has done for us.
It is simple to say that we don't have anything to worry about, after all if God is for us who can stand against us, but when you are face to face with someone, who has no consern for God's will, what do you do? Will we fall to persecution or will we stand up for what we believe? Truly only time will tell, God knows where we stand, and if that should ever come up in our lives, and we truly believe, then God will give us the strength and wisdom to deal with it.
Remember what John 15:19-21 says, "If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. Remember the words I spoke to you: 'No servant is greater than his master.' If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also. They will treat you this way because of my name, for they do not know the One who sent me." The heart of a servant will always want to do what God calls them to do; little or nothing will stand in their way. If dieing for your faith is necessary, then so be it; for isn't that a small pries to pay compared to paying for your sins?
Galatians 1:10 says, "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ."
Truly what Paul is saying is something we should all ask ourselves. If we are out to serve God, then we are not caring about what others think of us! When we put ourselves in roles of leadership are we not serving them rather then ourselves? If you look at the life of most pastors, you will find that most of their lives is spent learning about the word of God, and spreading the Good news they have learned to others. So ask yourself this if you are looking at leadership roles among your brothers and sisters in Christ, ' Am I doing this so I look good before them, to make myself feel good? Or am I doing it so that they can learn what God has shown me, so they can grow just as I have?'
Accountability is something we also have to look at, in leaders. If you don't hold them accountable for what they say, then what are you learning? For they are there to help you, and to hold you accountable, but if they aren't what good is it doing God? So ask someone to tell you when you do wrong, have them hold you to your word.
Speaking of accountability, I would like to know your thoughts on any of these studies, if there is something you would like to help understanding, maybe something you don't agree with, or want to know more about, I would be glad to answer any of your questions.